childhood innocence

Look Into Your Child’s Eyes

December 15, 2011

“Enjoy your kids, they’ll be grown before you know it,” has got to be the most repeated advice given to moms with young children. I can hardly walk into a store without a sweet grandma pausing to smile at the kids and remind me, “They grow up so fast!”

I believe it.

Each child added to the family seems to make the “play” speed of life a little faster. The time between Christmases feels shorter.

photo by kordian deren

Recently I was talking with my mother-in-law and she repeated the sage advice but added, “Make sure you take time to look into their eyes.”

Eyes are the “window of the soul” and “the light of the body.” (Matt. 6:22) Of course I look into my children’s eyes! I love them. But I’ve been consciously stopping to do so more.

When I look into my infant’s eyes, her whole face lights up like I’d handed her the moon with a few stars thrown in.
When I gaze into my toddler’s eyes and smile, I don’t need to add “I love you.” He knows it and wraps his arms around me.
When I look into my preschooler’s eyes, life’s little vexations seem little again.

Gazing into a child’s eyes is like pushing the pause button on the fast march of time. They grow up so quickly. Push the pause button often and gaze into their eyes.

Linked up at Proverbs 31 Thursdays, Finer Things Friday, Handful of Heart and Better Mom Monday

Creating a Worldview Through Forgotten Moments

December 3, 2011

photo by Your Pic Photography

My brother was playing with my children and turned to me. “Isn’t it weird to think,” he said, “that I’ve spent all this time playing with them and they won’t remember it? Yet this is helping mold their lives?!” It really is amazing.

Research shows that the experiences, rhythms, words, and atmosphere that surround infants and small children play a foundational role in later development.

Habits are formed. Conclusions about the world are unconsciously drawn. A worldview is created.

Yet most of these moments of laughter and tears will be forgotten.

The other night, Rose rolled out of her bed and woke up with night terrors. I tucked her back in bed and stroked her arm. She finally went back to sleep and I headed to bed and was soon fast asleep myself. She woke up with night terrors again. Josh tried to quiet her down so I could sleep, but she was inconsolable. Finally, he got her up and they had a midnight snack together: burnt toast (the more burnt the better, for my little gal) with butter and honey. She calmed down and went back to bed.

Morning came and she couldn’t remember a thing. She didn’t remember I’d put her back in bed or that she’d had a midnight snack.

Chances are, your children will not remember anything that you’ve done today. They’ll forget cutting out snowflakes together this morning. They’ll forget playing outside this afternoon. They’ll forget the many hours spent teaching them to shape bread or dry dishes.

How many memories do you have of your childhood? I have about a dozen distinct images of my very early childhood.

That’s all.

Out of all the countless hours my parents spent with me my first few years, a few dozen memories?

But the years sacrificially poured into raising and nurturing those little ones aren’t in vain!

photo by Your Pic Photography

Infants won’t remember the hours spent just holding them and gazing into their eyes. Toddlers won’t remember the many times you get up with them in the night. They will remember being loved.

They are learning about their world. Learning about faith and trust and patience and love and how to control their anger. Learning about God.

We have been given a great and glorious task: creating a worldview that reflects God’s truth.

It’s daunting. We will fail miserably. We can’t succeed in the end without God’s help. But with His grace we are called to create a world for our child. A world shaped by forgotten moments.

Linked up at Teach Me Tuesdays, Domestically Divine, Proverbs 31 Thursdays & A Handful of Heart

Tagged with: childhood innocence • matters of the heart

“Mama, Are You Happy?”

November 23, 2011

“Mama, are you happy,” my four year old loves to ask. She has a knack for asking just when I need the reminder. Like when I’m scrabbling to get dinner ready before company comes or wishing I could take a nap.

“Why YES, I am,” I answer. How can I not be when I have beautiful trusting blue eyes looking up into mine.

“Mama, why are you happy? Is it because you have three little children to love?”

There’s only one right answer to that question!

photo by polishpnut

Then we start our own version of “The Happy Game.”

Try it. You might like it as much as we do. Especially if you’re playing with a toddler! They have a wonderful ability to notice and be thankful for the many little blessings that surround us each day.

I am thankful for a God who loved me so much He redeemed me.
I get to be married to the man of my dreams. He loves me. I am very grateful.
I am grateful for children who decorate the carpet with cut-up magazine scraps. I am happy I get to stay home with them.
I have clean water to give my family to drink. I didn’t have to haul it up from a well! I even have a working refrigerator to keep it cold. I am so thankful!
My family has warm clothes to wear. I am happy. Especially because I didn’t have to sew them!
I am grateful for the weeds, sticks and leaves my toddler brings me to show his love.

What are you “happy about” today?

Linked up at Teach Me Tuesday and A Wise Woman

Tagged with: childhood innocence • contentment • kid quotes • matters of the heart

Crayon Meets Laundry

November 19, 2011

…or what happens if you think your day is going too smoothly.

Tagged with: childhood innocence • laughing at life • toddlerhood

Little Milestones

November 9, 2011

photo by Lesley Mackin

My daughter picked up a wash cloth off the floor (thanks spittupy baby!) and started to wipe her hands on it. Just as I was about to remind her that “the floor is dirty and we don’t wipe our hands on washcloths from the floor” she said to herself, “You don’t wipe buttery fingers on your clothes. Butter will stain them.” She was quoting from a conversation we had yesterday.

Taking their first step, saying their first word and reading their first book are major milestones in a child’s life. But each day with little ones is filled with milestones.

Little milestones.

They’re easy to miss. It doesn’t seem like a big deal to me that my toddler ate all his breakfast instead of dumping it into his cup (like he did every day the past week.) I’m sure it took a lot of self-restraint. Wiping her fingers on a dirty washcloth meant that my daughter had learned not to wipe them on her clothes.

Teaching a child is a lot like teaching math, as Rachel Jankovic puts it in her hilarious and inspiring book Loving the Little Years. Just as you master the basic addition of saying “please” and not coloring on the walls, basic subtraction gets thrown into the mix. It can feel like they’re never getting it. There’s always a new attitude to adjust or new concept to conquer. But really they’re passing milestones all the time. All that training will pay off.